Hillview Days - Poleing

Today's post will be about poleing. No, not poleing like those random thing people pass out to get your opinion on something.That's polling. No, poleing like ramming someone's crotch into a steel pole poleing. Yes, it does sound barbaric and it is, but it was a regular occurance in Hillview during our younger years, and like the use of the N word, we all thought that causing someone severe testicular trauma was hilarious. Yes, we were quite the twisted bunch.

Now poleing didn't involve much. All you needed was four pretty strong guys, an unlucky victim, and of course, a steel pole. Two of the guys would grab the victim under the arms and another two would grab both his legs and spread them open. They would then carry the person, outside and position him in front of the people. Then taking a short running start, they would introduce the victim's family jewels to the cold steel pole. Now I understand that this may be hard to visualize and I hoped to find a picture of it to actually show what poeling in action actually looks like, but I couldn't, despite the fact that we had several on the now 'defunct' hi5. However, I found a video clip of a movie which contains poleing, showing that this phenomena is not limited to Hillview or Trinidad and Tobago, though we were nowhere that violent. Or maybe we were. Watch it here and then come back. (You only need to watch the first 14 seconds or so. And yes, the boy being poled is Frodo a.k.a Elijah Wood)

There are several ways to escape being poled. One is refraining from engaging from any poleing activity. While this method may not always be effective, it did work for me, as I never was poled.
Another way is known as the 'Timmy method', developed by one of our classmates named Timothy. The 'Timmy Method' is very simple. All you have to do is bite your attackers. While this may be extremely gross, it is highly effective. Another way is to become to heavy to be poled. This is unhealthy, but really, no one is going to pick you up if they think they're going to throw their back out. You can also try being a girl. We never poled a girl...though I think we came close once...nah, just kidding! (no, really. Reanne, did we ever try to pole you? I can't seem to remember.)

But the general populace of our class never got poled. There were specific people who got poled, namely Jamie and Chaad. Below is a picture of them.



Now you know why we poled them. And no, we were not gay bashing. Just Jamie and Chaad bashing...which in Jamie's case can be considered gay bashing.

As we got older, the occurances of poleing decreased. We realized that there was something we all wanted to do in life and that we needed our crotches intact to do it. We hoped that the lower years would pick up the Hillview tradition, but they never did. Bunch of lameos. Nowhere as awesome as we were. Too bad. Poleing is awesome. As long as you're not the one being poled.

(Note: When I say 'we' I mean my friends. I was never involved in poleing anyone. And if anyone thinks otherwise, I dare them to prove it!)

See you tomorrow!

UPDATE: I managed to find a picture of poleing in progress. Here it is:
As you can see, you can also be poled on a table. It is a very versatile prank.