Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Writer's Drain

I'm very sure that each and everyone of you has heard about writer's block. It's pretty common right? It's when someone sit down and tries to write and nothing comes out. It's like there's some large wall blocking everything. Well, right now, I don't have writer's block. I have writer's drain.

'What's writer's drain?' you may ask. Well it's kind of the opposite of writer's block. Instead of wanting to write and nothing finding anything to write about, you have something to write about, but you don't feel like writing. And the reason why you've probably never heard about it is because I just made up the name.

I guess my current bout of writer's drain stems from the fact that NaNoWriMo is done. I have successfully written 50,000 words in one month. However, 19,000 of those words were written between Friday at around 7pm to Monday at about 1pm. Looking back, I have absoultely no idea how I did it. I just knew that there was something to be done and I did it. And let me tell you this, it was hard work. Anyone who ever thought that writers have a easy job because they get to sit at a computer and write stories all day are completely wrong. I have never done something more physically and mentally draining in my life. But I persevered and I did it.

And now, I'm drained. I had at least two ideas for this post that I started typing and then deleted because I just didn't feel like writing them. I was kinda scared at first that I had used up all my writing ability. So I did what I always do when I can't write: I just type the first thing that comes to my mind, ergo this post. And I realize now what writer's drain is.

It's probably as simple to cure writer's drain as it is to cure writer's block. With writer's block, you write anything as much as you could. With writer's block, you write nothing. So I guess I'll take a break from writing for a while. Yes, I'll still have a post up tomorrow, but it'll be a novel excerpt, probably my last one for a while. I think just a day off would help a lot, and then I'd be back and better than ever.

See ya tomorrow!!

Monday, November 29, 2010

Dear NaNoWriMo

As of 1:15 pm today I became the author of 50060 words. I am not finished with my novel, but I'm going to stop writing for now and study for finals.

And oh yes, I do wish to make a speech.

*clears throat*

Dear NaNoWriMo,

I hate you. You came along when I was doing just fine and beguiled me with a promise of glitz and glory. You said that writing a novel in a month would be the most wonderful thing ever. You lied. There is nothing wonderful about having to stay up until 6 a.m. (stay up, not wake up) so that you could make up your word count because you're so drastically behind. You pulled me away from my important engineering classes and exams to entice me with some childhood fantasy about being a writer. While all my other friends were playing the latest video games and Facebook apps, I was writing. While they were watching and talking about all the latest TV shows, I was writing. When they were reading all the latest manga...you guessed it. I was writing. You took away from my social life so that I'd have time to write. You made my friends question my priorities and ask whether or not I had 'nothing to do' if I had time to write 50000 words.You angered me, depressed me and frustrated me in what was already a hectic month of my life. And for what? So that I could end up with a half finished, crappy story with horrible spelling and a sorry excuse for English. A story whose synopsis is so controversial that I can't even tell some people what it's about. A story that no one is ever going to read and even if they do, they're never going to like it. You NaNoWriMo. You wasted my time. And I hate you for that.

But NaNoWriMo, I think that I love you. You came along when my life had fallen into a boring routine and spiced it up with excitement. You said that writing a novel in a month would be the most wonderful thing ever. You were right. You showed me that if I really wanted to do something that I could stay up till 6am or however long and do it. You pulled me away from the stress of being an engineering sophomore and showed me that no matter what career path I chose, I would always be a writer at heart and that is what really mattered. While my friends were wasting time on other things, you showed me just how much could be done in all that time that I wasted on frivolous things that would always be there waiting for me. You enhanced my social life by allowing me to make friends with people not only across the Caribbean but around the world. You made my friends look on in awe and wonder as I struggled to overcome obstacles and as I won victories. You taught me perseverance, loyalty and you comforted me in what was the most hectic month of my life. And for what. So that at the end I could have 50060 words of a story that would have otherwise never been told. A story with characters that seem so real as they try to navigate their complex lives, that they literally jump off the page and whisper with their own voices in my ear. A story whose synopsis is controversial, but one that needed to be told, so that I can have the opportunity one day tell the whole world. A story that at least one person in the world would read and love and be affected deeply by it, even if that person is me. You NaNoWriMo. You made me a better person. And I love you for that.


(Yes, I did manage to beat LaniLani. She was great competition though!!)

(P.S. I did in fact cry while I was writing this. I'm that much of a wuss :P. It could also be the fact that a share a name with the person that the Bible calls the 'weeping prophet')

See you guys tomorrow!!

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Hillview Days - Monkey Belt

If you're a normal person and not a twisted corrupted former Hillview student you're probably wondering what in the world is a monkey belt. Well, happy reader, let me enlighten you as two what it is.

Monkey Belt ( pronounced mŭngki bɛlt) is an activity which entails several individuals who remove their belts and shout "MONKEY BELT" before proceeding to beat the crap out of an unsuspecting victim. Ok...so the victim isn't actually unsuspecting and they don't actually beat them. They just make it look like they do. Confused? You should be. Here's a video of an actual occurrence of monkey belt. Now before you watch this video, let me assure that no matter how harsh or brutal it may seem, no one was actually ever hurt. The guy who was being beaten (who actually happens to be one of my best friends) got up off of the ground right after laughing and high five'ing the other guys. We never forced anyone to participate in monkey belt who didn't want to. This was all scripted and planned out before and never once was the guy actually kicked or hit with a belt. However, you can't bear to watch an innocent boy been beaten while his girlfriend sit with one of his attackers and just watches, then you probably shouldn't watch this video.

Now to all my readers who are not Hillview students (or SAGHS (St. Augustine Girls High School because they are just as twisted as we are...maybe even more) who are thinking "OH MY GOD!! THEY JUST BEAT THE GUY!!", calm down. Like I said, no one was actually hurt.

"BUT THEY THREW HIM ON THE GROUND AND HIT HIM WITH A SHOE!!"
Yes, they did, but it didn't hurt because he still laughs about it till today. Or maybe it did hurt and he just laughs to hide the pain....no seriously, all it was cool.

"WELL HOW WOULD YOU KNOW?! IT WASN'T YOU BEING BEATEN!!"
Actually, I did participate in a monkey belt where I was the victim, and I could tell you from experience that you have to keep yourself from laughing all the way through. My video didn't make it to YouTube though. It was deemed to racist. We had no problem using the word 'Nigger' but we drew the line at uploading videos that displayed black people being beaten by people of lighter complexion.

So there you have it. No real moral (no moral at all!!) to this story. Just another installment of my twisted days at Hillview College. See you tomorrow!!

Oh, I almost forgot: someone once told me that my Hillview posts may disturb some of my international readers and others who don't understand them. So tell me readers, are you disturbed?

Saturday, November 27, 2010

I'm Back!

I hate excavators.

Like really really really hate them. I know that they are an important piece of machinery and that if they didn't exist we wouldn't have all the wonderful architecture and buildings that we have today, but that does nothing to quell the burning anger boils in me and the bitter taste that coats my tongue ever time I see one of these cursed pieces of machinery. Why do you ask? Why do I hate excavators so much? Is it because they made noise that kept me up at night? Is it because they caused a horrible accident that killed a puppy? Is it because one of them hit my wife and killed our unborn child? (though I must admit if something like that had actually happened, I would hate excavators a lot more than I do now.)

No, it was because I had to build one. And if you think that that is no reason for someone to hate excavators, then you have obviously never tried to build one. Not until you struggle with and 18 equation matrix from which you must calculate the bore size of you hydraulics or try to calculate the mass eccentricity of your vibrating plate compactor or make up a giant table on things that could possibly go wrong with your excavator then you would begin to understand my sheer loathing for this device.

But enough about that. The project has come and gone and has taken a great deal of the last two weeks with it. I haven't been able to write my NaNoWriMo ( I am currently about 7000 words behind schedule) or post on my blog. It was so intense one day that I had to get someone else to do my Bible Study! Again...enough about that. It is time to move on with my life. I have so many things to look forward to!! Like...finals. *sigh* Life can be so depressing sometimes.

Yeah, I have finals in just about a week and I am definitely not as prepared for it as I should be. So I'm going to try to finish up all my NaNoWriMo stuff and get right on that. Since I've been away for so long, I'm going to try to post during finals. Yes, I know it's very risky, but I'll just have to make shorter posts.

But at least for now and the forseeable future, I am back to posting daily. I want to thank you guys for not abandoning me and you can look forward to more awesome posts in the future. I love you all and I'll see you tomorrow.
Bye!

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Shanu

Today's post is about on of my best friends, Shanu.

Now, this is one cool dude. He was the main guy that supported me when I was starting this blog. He even helped me with choosing the name for it and posting links and stuff to garner support. When I went on a retreat and couldn't post my daily link he did that for me. If you go back to to very first posts, you'd see that he commented on them to get me started. Aside from his help with my blog, he's a pretty awesome guy. He's one of the five us who went on epic Japs runs, during which we would point and laugh at the most retarded of things. Shanu is one of those people you can talk crap with for hours and not get bored. He's definitely one of my closest friends in the world.

But we'd didn't always used to be friends. In fact, at on time, we were worst enemies. I remember in Form 2 (my second year of high school for those of you who have a different schooling system), I hated this guy's guts. Seriously, I did. When I first started high school, I was picked on a lot for one reason or another, and Shanu and his friends were major participants in that. Now physically, if I stand next to Shanu, I am a great deal taller than he is, but back then, he was the one that was more intimidating. I remember having a Ericcson flip phone (yes just Ericcson, not Sony Ericcson. This was prior to the buy over :p). I wasn't supposed to keep in my schoolbag, but I couldn't check it in like I was supposed to so I kept it. Shanu and one of his friends found out about this somehow,snuck into my bag and a Crazy Glued the flip to the keypad. When I tried to open it later....well, let's just say that you should never crazy glue your phone shut. Shanu and the other guy got found out, and they apologized and the other guy had to pay to get my phone fixed, but yeah I hated him real bad.

And then suddenly I didn't. I don't remember exactly when it happened. All I know is that one they I wished he'd die, and the next, we were hanging out. I seem to vaguely remember it starting in Form 5 (fifth year of high school) but that's all. I used to think that I'd never want to be friends with this guy, and now, I can't imagine how life would be if I wasn't.

So you see that person who you really really hate. Don't give up and being friends with them. Don't ever say or do something that could really hurt them. Yes, you may be saying "Jeremiah, you have no idea how much I hate this person!!", but that's exactly the way I felt about Shanu. You never know what the future has for you guys. You could go from worst enemies to best friends. And you'd wonder why the hell you hated them in the first place.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Are you free?

People like to talk about freedom, and what it means to be free. We all love freedom right? That's why we like and support democracy and capitalism and everything that the world looks up to as freedom right now. We all ask our parents to give us a little freedom as we get older. We start wars to win it. Our laws are litter with stuff about freedom. Freedom of speech, freedom of religion, freedom of the press and so on and so forth. We're surrounded by it from the day we are born to the day we die. And yet it surprises me how little people know about it.

One of the people I really admire, posted a small blog the other day. This is basically what it said: To stop living in the way society tells you to live and start living the way you want to live. Forget what everyone tells you to do. Break the rules and ignore the consequences. Stop coloring inside the lines. It's your life. Live it the way you want to.
And that got me thinking: is that really freedom? It sure sounds like it. But is it really?

What if you liked the way society did things. What if you cared about the consequences? What it you liked coloring in the lines because you saw that the lines existed for a reason? What if you wanted to follow the rules? Does that mean that you're not free?

Well, the way I see it, it doesn't. Freedom isn't recklessly living life. That's wild abandon. Sure it may be fun, and who knows, you may even get by living like that in certain circumstances, but that doesn't mean that your free. You could be doing all this because not because you want to, but because you think that it's what makes you free. You'd be kept in bondage by the worst person to keep you there: yourself. There are people who live by the book all their lives and die old and happy, with no regrets. And there are those who live wildly with so called freedom and die young, some even committing suicide, trying to find a way out.

So what then is freedom? Well, there simplest explanation I've ever heard come from a movie: The Matrix Revolutions. Remember that seen near the end where Agent Smith was moping the floor with Neo and Neo kept getting up even though he knew he'd just get his butt whooped again? Agent Smith got mad and started screaming at him

Why, Mr. Anderson, why, why? Why do you do it? Why get up? Why keep fighting? Do you believe you're fighting for something, for more than your survival? Can you tell me what it is? Do you even know? Is it freedom? Or truth? Perhaps peace? Could it be for love?

Neo then answered calmly: Because I choose to.

That's freedom my friends. It's not doing something or not doing something. There is no one thing, no one action, no one lifestyle that can define freedom. Freedom come from choice. It doesn't come from coloring inside the lines or outside. It comes from having the choice to do either.People tell me that since I'm a Christian and I don't do certain things that they do, that I am not free, kept in bondage by some god. But I just laugh when they say that because I know that I am far more free than they'll ever be. Freedom isn't me doing all the crazy things that I want to do. Freedom is knowing that I can do every single one of those crazy things and choosing not to. To me, I'm have freedom in Christ. From where I stand, all those other people are in bondage, slaves to their own desires.

I'm not saying that you saying that obeying the rules brings freedom. If being crazy makes you free, then by all means, keep being free. Keep yourself happy and live your life to the fullest. Just make sure that the reason why you're doing it is because it's what you deliberately choose to do. That's the only way you'd ever be free. So if you want, go ahead and walk on the sidewalk. Wait for the light to change before you cross the street. Go to school, listen to mainstream music and obey the rules. As long as it's what you choose to do, then you'll be as free as then evening breeze and the mountain stream. Lift your head high and hum your favorite tune as you watch the shackles that bind you fall away.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Hillview Days - 1000 Words?

Hey guys, those projects are still at my throat so I don't have the time to do a proper Hillview post. So I thought I'd try something different. You know that say picture tells a 1000 words? Well I'm pretty sure that that goes doubly for Hillview pics. So tell me, what do you thing is the story behind this picture:

Leave comment or something tell me what you think was going on.

P.S. I know that this idea is going to be a total disaster and fail horribly, but I just felt like I had to make a post. See you tomorrow, hopefully.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Pivotal Point?

So here's the thing guys...I have two, yes TWO projects due for next week, both of which are groups projects which I really, really, have to do, or suffer severe bodily harm. So, for this week at least, I may not be able to put up posts as regularly as I used to. So don't feel as if I've given up on the blog...I've just taken a little time off.

I also realized that I missed Wednesday's post, which was supposed to be a novel excerpt and I decided to give one here instead. This is supposedly the a pivotal scene in my novel, and I wanted to know what you guys think about it. Now, this is only Seth's point of view and it's not even the whole thing, because that would be too long. Maybe I'd post up the rest of it next week. Please gimme some feedback either here or on the Facbook page. I'd greatly appreciate it.

They walked again in silence until Emily said “That’s the sorority where I stay.”
A wave of relief swept over Seth, happy that the disastrous journey was over and that he could now go sulk in a corner and chastise himself. “Oh crap.” Emily said, her voice suddenly grave. For a horrifying instant, Seth wondered if he had just said what he was thinking out loud. His blood turned to ice in his veins and he turned to face her. But Emily was looking past him to the sorority yard. He turned to see a girl picking up random scattered objects on the lawn. He didn’t see what was so shocking about that. “Someone threw all of Cassie’s stuff out.” She said.
Seth’s thawing blood refroze. “Did you just say Cassie?”
“Yeah, Cassie. She’s one of the girls staying in the sorority. Apparently she’s a lesbian and she hit on one of the other girls. I guess that’s why they threw her stuff out.” Emily shook her head. “Sorority drama. Well, bye Seth. See you next week.”
Seth managed to crack a smile and replied. “Yeah, next week Emily.” She turned and walked up to the sorority door, carefully going around Cassie, making sure that she didn’t get anywhere near to her. Seth stood there for a second, staring at Cassie as she angrily stomped around the yard picking her things up. He would have merely shaken his head and walked off, but then he saw something that cemented him to the spot. As Cassie turned in his direction, he got a good look at her face. Her eyes were blood red and large tears streamed down her cheeks. Memories hit him like a ton of bricks. Memories of a young boy crying as he gather that contents of his school bag that had been scattered all over the playing field while enduring that stinging taunts and laughter of the ones who put them there. He shook his head, trying to stop the memory from replaying in his head. Why was he thinking of that now? This was different right? The promise didn’t cover this, did it? But the longer he stood there and watched her, he became more convinced that it did. Slowly, his legs began to move in the direction of the sorority lawn. “No!” a small part of his mind screamed. “Think about what you are doing!” But his feet wouldn’t listen. They walked him straight through the gate and up to Cassie’s things. He was close enough to hear her small sobs, which nearly overwhelmed him with the potent memory in his mind. The rest of his body followed the rebellion. His waist bent over and his had reached down to a shining object in the grass. It was a golden picture frame with a picture of Cassie and another brunette girl, who he had seen her with sometimes. He straightened himself up and looked at her. She still hadn’t seen him yet, too busy with gathering his things. A bubble formed in his chest, travelled up his throat and came through his lips. “Here” He said, holding out the picture in his hand.


Oh, and by the way, I started a word war with one of my fellow carinanos!! Her username is LaniLani. You could check out status here.


Yes, I am currently winning...I think..

Friday, November 12, 2010

Christmas, Finals and Writing

There is nothing more depressing than hearing Christmas music before finals. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. That moment when your heart swells and soars with the sound of music that conjures up thoughts of gifts, parang (Trinidadian/Spanish Christmas music) and plenty, plenty food. You could almost taste that ham!

And then the thought of finals falls on top of you like a giant boulder, crushing your happy thoughts and dragging you down to the depths of despair...yes, I am being a tad bit melodramatic. But nonetheless, finals are on the way, and like every year, I feel like I'm nowhere near prepared for it, even if it's three weeks away (THREE WEEKS?!? So close?! *gulp*), only because I probably am nowhere near prepared. Which would lead you to ask the question "Well, why not go study?" Well, my dear readers, if I knew the answer to that, then I wouldn't be feeling ill prepared. And now I here that the lecturers want to strike by withholding our exams. Oh, the drama.

And then there's Christmas. Yes. A time of fun, friends and...catering. My mom is caterer and she gets most of her business at this time of year so at Christmas time, my house is some kind of crazy. Even though my work load isn't intense during that time, it's still significant. But I can't say that I don't like it. There's something heavenly about a house that smells like an entire Christmas dinner everyday. I'm really going to miss catering at Christmas time when I leave home.

And then there's my writing. I'm 2 days behind on my novel so I plan to stay up however long it take tonight to catch back up to where I'm supposed to be. That's going to be extremely difficult. I plan to print it out at the end of my finals, edit it during December and re-write it. And maybe, just maybe (BIG maybe) see about getting it published...if I could get past how horrible the prose is. I'm trying real hard to balance all my writing stuff and school and it's been working out pretty good...I think.

It seems I have lot to look forward to. I hope and pray that everything works out for the best. And that's about it. No life lesson today. Just a little update.

I'll see you tomorrow!

Thursday, November 11, 2010

I'll See You Tomorrow

I was going to do a post on some local controversy concerning a journalist, but right before I did, I found out something that shook me to the core, so I decided to write about that instead.

So one of my friends posted on her Facebook status that she had to say bye bye to her Blackberry. Reading it, I assumed that she'd lost her phone. Apparently it wasn't a simple as that. You see, she was traveling home when a guy pointed a gun at her on a maxi and took her phone away. Needless to say, she's extremely traumatized.

Now, it seems silly to think that someone who was just robbed at gun point to say that they miss their BB, but I guess that's what we all do in a manner of speaking. We take all the big things for granted, and we angonize over the small, unnecessary ones. I wouldn't have thought twice about anything happening to my friend, and I would have woken up tomorrow thinking, "Hey, I'm going to see that person today." And I would have been wrong. It could have ended up all so very different and I would have one friend less tomorrow. As I type this, I feel like crying. I feel stupid for not being thankful that all my friends and family are all alive and in good health and I've never really lost anyone close to me. I wake up everyday and expect everything to be perfectly normal and think that my life would carry on as usual, never considering the fact that at any moment, death could take someone and just like that, I'd never see them again. Never tell them that joke I wanted to, never give them that anime I'm supposed to bring. Never tell them that there's a Savior who loved them enough to die for them.

We shouldn't take tomorrow for granted, because it's not granted. God gives tomorrows and God withholds them. So today, right now, go that person that you've been meaning to tell something and tell them it, whether it be a joke, or just simply telling them that you love them.

I'm happy that I'll be able to see my friend tomorrow, and hopefully many many tomorrows after that.

And you guys too! I hope to see you tomorrow as well.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Meet Maggie

When I started this novel, I had originally intended for it to have two main characters, Cassie and Seth. But as my writing progress, another character pushed herself to the front, refusing to be ignored. And when you have a character that pushy, you can't help but let her have her way. So guys and girls: meet Maggie.

Maggie put her fingers at her temples, trying to massage away the migraine she could feel coming on. Cassie was sitting across from Seth again, the two of them strangely resembling two wrestlers before a big bout. Rei was standing the corner of the empty classroom, with an oblivious expression on her face. Cassie had come to school looking like a thundercloud before she came to the meeting. What after had happened to her to make her act that way made her snap continuously at during the meeting and seeing as how there was no one on the world who could piss Seth off like Cassie could…well, now you get why she had a headache.”Guys!” she shouted, holding her hands up like a referee. Cassie’s and Seth’s murderous glares moved from each other and locked on her. “Yikes!” she thought to herself. She steeled her nerves. Since the first meeting she had found out exactly why the two of them hated each other. “Yes Cassie, I understand that you’re gay and, yes Seth, I get that you’re Christian and that the two of you don’t like each other very much. But could the both of you please forget those things when you come to our class meetings? You both want to pass the course with a good grade, right?” They both nodded slowly. “Then why don’t you work towards this common goal instead of fighting over all the other stuff?”

“I would if Seth would stop trying to influence the group with his ideologies.” Said Cassie, making air quotes when she said ‘ideologies’.
“I would too, if Cassie would act like a regular human being. But I guess that’s what happens when you go against nature. You get messed up!” Seth snapped back.
“Oh boy.” Maggie thought worried. She could feel the headache coming on with a renewed vigor. If honey wasn’t working, then she’d have to use vinegar. “Listen! As group reader I have to give a rating for each of the group members. Do want me to give you a bad rating? Because I assure you that it would lower you already very low grade we’d get for this course if you continue at this rate!” Seth and Cassie still glowered but it lessened. She breathed a sigh of relief. That had seemed to calm them down. “And Rei?” she said looking at the standing in the corner. She was staring at Seth again with the creepy look on her face. “Jin!” she shouted snapping her out of her trance. Rei looked startled. “Try to...just try to pay attention.” Rei nodded. “So are we all going to agree and work on this project together?” she asked emphazing on the last word. They all nodded collectively. “Whew!” she breathed. She could feel the headache subsiding and a twinge of pride swelling in her chest. She’s just successfully navigated a crisis as a leader. She gave herself a pat on the back.

Note: Yeah, Rei is a new character as well. I'm only going to be post small parts, not in chronological order, since it's not very wise to upload your entire novel online.

See you tomorrow!!

Monday, November 8, 2010

Random Novel Excerpt

I had a bout of writer's block on Saturday that kinda made me go a little crazy with my novel. The 1667 words that I typed aren't even in chronological order of where I am right now. It's like 3/4 way through the novel. But hey, if the inspiration hits you, you write it. So here it is: the Random Novel Excerpt.

Megan cracked her knuckles and reclined back in her seat with a sigh. Her eyes drooped and burned. She looked down at the time word counter at the bottom of the Microsoft Word window. “Only 400 to my word count. I’m sure I could make it.” She said to herself. “Yeah right,” herself said back. “You can barely even keep your eyes open. I have no idea why you’re doing this NaNoWriMo craziness when you have an insane workload like you do.” NaNoWriMo was a novel writing exercise that took place every November. It encouraged you to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days. When you divided it up, it came up to 1667 words per day. 1667 words may not sound so daunting, but when you’re sitting down in front of your computer at 3:00 am, you being to realize what a pain it can be. Especially when you know that you definitely have more important things to do. It was only a week into November and she was already falling behind. She had a math midterm to study for and a couple projects to pass up, but she had ignored all that to focus on her novel. It was academic suicide and she knew it, but it was just something she had to do.

Ever since she was a child, she’d wanted to become a writer. While the other kids spent their spare time watching TV or playing games, she sit at her desk at middle school and write. Sometimes, it got her branded as a nerd by the other students and as a “troubled child” some of her teachers. But she was a really good writer and no one could deny that. As she grew older, her teachers began taking notice of her talents urging her to continuer and praising her skill. Her friends would tell her how much they enjoyed the stuff she wrote – at least the stuff she let them read. She was always shy with her writing, afraid that it wouldn’t be good enough. But she’d never been told that she wasn’t. And, at least back then, she was really sure that she was going to be a world famous author.

Then real life intervened. The world was literally littered with writers. Only a few made it to the top and became famous. Others struggled to make ends meet and died penniless, not because they weren’t good enough, but simply because they never got their breakthrough. The world was on the verge of an economic breakdown and jobs were beginning to get increasingly harder to find. Writing may be fun and liberating, but it didn’t always put food on the table. She needed a real career, one with a job that would provide enough money for her to survive comfortably. So she turned to studying science instead of studying literature as she had originally intended. She liked science. It interested her and left room for experimentation. It seemed that it was the most logical and realistic choice of career paths. But she had nowhere near the kind of love she had for writing for it. She told herself that it was only for a while, just long enough for her to get a proper job. Then she’d become a writer. But in truth, she had given up on her dream as a childhood fantasy. She’d taken her writing skill and locked in a metaphorical box in the attic of her mind. She came to St. Augustine College and enrolled in the Physics program they had there. And for a while she was happy there. The work wasn’t easy, but she wasn’t a dummy. She could pull her own weight fairly well in class. But everyday when she went to class she would see the excitement and the passion of the other students and wonder what right she had being here. She was probably taking the place of someone who really wanted to be there. No matter how much she tried to push the thought out her mind, she felt as if she had missed her calling. That she should be over in the Humanities faculty, studying something that didn’t have so many numbers and Greek symbols. She could feel her writing ability slowly fade away in the back of her mind. She thought that that part of her life was over forever.

Then one night, while she was mindlessly surfing the internet, she came across one of her Facebook friend’s blog. He was participating in NaNoWriMo and he had made a blog post on exactly what it entailed. A light went off in her head and she felt a stirring in her gut. Here was a way for her to pursue both of her dreams simultaneously, without having to sacrifice one for the other. Sure, it would be a stretch. College physics was no easy matter. She’d have a lot of work to do aside from the task of writing a 50,000 word novel, but she was determined to make it work or die trying, whether physically or academically, she wasn’t quite sure yet. Everyone who she told of her decision asked her if she was nuts or hitting the happy juice. They said that she could never pull something like that off and that everyone else who was participating in NaNoWriMo probably had nothing else to do with their time, or had an easier schedule. But she ignored their counsel, having already made up her mind to do it.

Now she wished that she had listened to them. She’d never stayed up this late to do her school work, but here she was doing it for some crazy noveling goal, trying to recapture something she’d lost. There was a name for what she was doing. Oh, that’s right. It was called a lost cause. She was on the end of her frayed nerves, wondering how she was going to ride out the next couple weeks, much less find time to study for finals. She sighed and rested her head on her desk. She wanted to sleep so badly, but she knew that there was so much more that she had to do. She should have known that resting her head on the desk wasn’t a very smart idea when you were as tired as she was, but her back and neck were killing her. “Just five minutes,” she though to herself. She wasn’t even going to sleep. She was going to just stay still and let her body relax for a while. But every one knows that when you stay still for any amount of time when you’re tired, you inevitably fall asleep. Megan’s eye’s fluttered as she tried to keep them open, and before she realized, she had drifted of to sleep.

Being a writer meant having a vivid imagination. And having a vivid imagination meant having very vivid dreams. Like the one Megan was having right now. She was floating in mid-air over a dark empty stretch of road. Seth was walking along the road, with a knapsack. He was walking quickly, as if he was trying to get away from something. Behind him ran Cassie, trying to catch up with him, her face wet with tears. Megan couldn’t here any sound but it seemed as if she was calling out for him to stop. He stopped and turned around and shouted something angrily at her. She shook her head and held out something to him. It was a sheet of paper with something printed on it. Seth slowly took the paper from her hand and stared at it. Then he deliberately ripped it in half.

The sound of the tearing paper ripped through the air suddenly Megan could hear everything. The street suddenly wasn’t empty anymore. It was busy, with cars driving up and down. There was a large building with people crowded in front of it. In the crowd, Megan could see Rebecca standing there, talking to some people with microphone and cameras. She still couldn’t here what she was saying; only being able to catch incoherent pieces. Rebecca had spotted Cassie and Seth and began stalking towards them, wearing an expression that could be best described as a mixture of triumph and anger. Seth and Cassie were still arguing. She could only make out little pieces of their conversation like when she was trying to listen to Rebecca. She managed to here Seth say “out of your life,” and “was right all along.” Cassie said something about “didn’t know this was going to happen” and “understand me better.” None of this made the slightest bit of sense to Megan. She wished she could move closer to hear exactly what they were saying, but she had no means of propelling herself through the air. Seth saw Rebecca approaching and started to walk away. Cassie reached out and grabbed his arm, but he shook it off and said to her what sounded like “Goodbye, Cassie.” before walking off. As he turned around, Megan got a better look at his face, and could see now that he was crying as well. Just then, loud high pitch scream filled the air. A large shadow fell over the street below, turning everything a creepy blood red color. A large dark pillar slammed down in the space between Cassie and Seth. Megan could feel the vibration of the impact all the way through the air, though neither of them seemed to be aware of what was going on. Megan followed the pillar upwards and found that it was connected to another massive black mass. Another pillar extended from that mass to the ground on next side of it. It took her a minute to recognize what they were. “Legs!” she thought, shocked. Those two massive pillars were the legs of some massive creature. She looked up the see it’s face, but it’s head extended up into the clouds. The creature let loose another shrill and from her right, she heard a loud whooshing sound. She turned just in time to see one of the creature’s massive arms rushing towards her. She tried to scream, but she couldn’t and she couldn’t move either. The arm reached out and grabbed her, tightened her in a death grip.

She awoke with a start. Sunlight streamed through her window. To her dismay, she found that she had slept all the way through to the morning. She barely had time to think about her weird dream as she rushed to get ready for school.

Note: She seems familiar, doesn't she? :p