The Laws of Anime

I am personally a really big fan of anime and manga. Shounen (specifically made to target young males), mecha (contains large amounts of giant robots) and psychological (you don’t need and explanation for that) are among my favorites to watch and/or read. They’re all pretty good, and have their own unique worlds and storylines, but if you watch enough, you begin to see a lot of similarities in them. Some people call this phenomenon “The Laws of Anime”. Tonight, I found a couple of them on the internet, that I felt that I had to share with you, and I even invented some of my own. So here are the Top 20 Laws of anime:

1) The Law of  Polar-Changing Blood Pressure – When a character is wounded, his wound usually spurts an insanely large amount of blood. The wound then doesn’t bleed for the rest of the fight.

2) The Law of Multiple Camera Angles – When a “Good Guy” attacks a “Bad Guy”, this law dictates that it must be shown from at least three different camera angles.

3) The Law of One – Only one fight can take place at a particular time in a particular area. No matter how many bad guys there are or how much time is of the essence, you can only have one fight at a time.

4) The Law of One (2) – The main character is always the One. If he’s not, then someone else who is close to him is. It doesn’t matter what he’s the One of. He’s just the One.

5) The Law of One (3) – When one ship/mech/warrior/ninja/sparkly vampire goes up against an army, the army usually losses…because armies are unreliable like that.

6) The Law of the Power of Love and Friendship – No matter what secret weapon the enemy has, no matter how forbidden his forbidden magic ritual, no matter how massive his galaxy wide armada of military force is, he can always be defeated when we join hands and believe in our friends!

7) The Law of Feminine Clothing Destruction – The size of a female anime characters breasts are directly proportional to the number of instances in which her clothes are ripped, torn or otherwise maimed and/or removed.

8) The Law of Healing Laundry Detergent – When a character is healed after battled, the dirt on his clothes and skin are magically removed along with his wounds.

9) The Law of Super Special Attacks – Super special attacks that can kill the enemy in one blow must be reserved for a last ditched effort when the user is usually too weak to use it without causing permanent damage to himself.

10) The Law of Five – All good teams of anime characters come in 5. They usually are:
The main character
The girl who was his best friend prior to the series who eventually becomes his girlfriend at the end
His best friend who is usually also his rival
The incredibly smart friend who is incredibly useless and usually ignored unless he discovers some key weakness of the enemy
The other female character who also harbors feelings for the main character but they are never realized. She’s really only there to round off the five.

11) The Law of Sportsmanship – If you or your opponent uses an attack that completely surprises the other and has them reeling, one should stop and explain the attack and exactly how it works to give the other a chance to come up with a counter – just to be fair

12) The Law of Glowing – Never, ever mess with or irritate someone who glows. Ever. Unless you yourself glow.

13) The Law of Nasal Hemorrhaging - When anime males witness anything perverted, the usually experience intense nosebleeds. This has led to a high number of deaths among hemophiliac Japanese males.

14) The Law of Ocular Occlusion: An anime characters eyes must take up at least 25% of their face. If needs be, the size of other facial features may be reduced.

15) The Law of Screaming – The power of an attack is directly proportional the amount of screaming that precedes it.

16) The Law of Reverse Technological Advancement – No matter how advanced the technology of the day may be, if you find an ancient weapon, you can pretty much defeat anybody.

17) The Law of Time-lag Slashes – When ever someone it cut by a sword or any other sharp object, it usually take a couple seconds for it to take effect. This is then usually followed by the events described in Law#1

18) The Law of Main Character Domination: No matter how powerful the villain becomes, the main character will always have this one secret-never-before-seen-and-never-will-be-seen-again move that utterly defeats him.

19) The Law of Inverse Female Attraction – The less a male character seeks a relationship with the opposite sex, the greater chance he has of getting one. The opposite is also true

20) The Law of Follicular Invulnerability – Hair and hairstyles are invulnerable. No matter how many fights you’ve been in, no matter how long you spent in that hell dimension or how long you spent trekking through hazardous terrain without any basic amenities, your hair will remain the same.

 

Yeah…I am running low on things  to write about.

See you tomorrow!!!